I've taken to answering the BF-questions with "No. Nobody wants me.", but they just think that's insanely funny. I... WHAT?
And then my grandmother, who can barely see anymore, will tell me I've a fat ass. YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE MY ASS. IT MIGHT NOT BE FAT ANYMORE. OKAY IT IS, BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT. SHUT UP.
You see why I like being home alone?