See, this is exactly why I shouldn't allow myself to have hope. It's pointless. Everything always just blows up in my face.
Feeling sorry for myself yet? Hell yeah!
I spent the whole day being insanely jealous of happy people. Happy people suck. I friggin' hate happy people. Ack!
[whine]It's just not fair, damn it![/whine]
The only tiny bit of comfort in all this is that I'm a fucking amazing actress. Fooled everyone into thinking I was just fine, when all the while I was screaming inside. They should give me a fucking Oscar or something.
(Sorry about all this profanity. I know Star really doesn't approve of it, but can you just skip over all the bad words, hun?)
And I'm not really looking forward to having to spend the rest of my life alone.
I mean, this was my last chance, you know? Where else am I ever going to meet someone besides in a mental institution? Well, turns out I'm not even good enough for the crazies.
I just feel so fucking stupid. I really believed he cared. Heh. Like anyone could ever care about a loser like me. *insane laughter*
Okay, time to go to bed, methinks. *sigh*
What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, right? I'd rather it'd just kill me.